EAGLES MAILATA HAS VANISHED: HE DOESN’T EVEN KNOW WHAT HE IS!

By Michael Bennett

Okay, the Eagles made a splash when they wasted the 233rd pick in the 2018 draft on a rugby player from Down Under.

Since then, Jordan Mailata has never appeared in an NFL game, either last season or this.

And now, with the Eagles’ offensive line, which some lame-ass local media types called “the best in the NFL” starting to look less than the best, fans are wondering:

Whatever happened to the 6-8, 346-pound Mailata?

The New York Times actually has apiece coming up this Sunday, and they don’t seem to know.

But they’re having fun with the novelty:

He has stock replies for people who remark on his size and ask what he does: “I say bodyguard. Or scaffolder. Or window washer.”

On an off day last season, Mailata and several of his teammates were walking through Reading Terminal Market, a popular gathering spot, when they were approached, as he put it, “by a group of drunk, middle-aged ladies from New Jersey.” They wanted to know what sport the men played.

The players at first said they were not pro athletes, but when the women said they did not believe that, Mailata stepped forward and said: “Yes, we are. We’re figure skaters. We’re here for an international ice-skating competition.”

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